scallywagdaddy

I ask those inquisitive minds out there to refer to the myspace account for this posting.

http://www.myspace.com/scallywagdaddy

Today I got to feed Bella some rice cereal for the first time and She eats just like her daddy, no nonsence, just get the food in there as fast you can. She's so much more responsive now. I used to think of her as some kind of pet that I went out and picked up but now that she's smiling and playing she seems more and more like a real little person. She's got her likes and dislikes and her very own little personality.

She learning to crawl which means that sooner or later I'll be running around chasing her through the house like my grandpa used to do with us kids. the only difference is that he would take his dentures out first so that he could pretend to be some giant toothless monster. Ya know, now that I think about it a toothless monster doesn't sound that scary, why the hell were we running from him.

She was laying on the floor moments ago and now she insists on being in my lap and now I have to fight for control of the keyboar..... g rhth cg rtc g[798miijj jjjjjjjjjjjjjj ... guess she won that fight. I should probably get used to her winning.

Arrgh! It do be me birthday on the morrow. I be plannin to do nothin but be a worthless scallywag.

At 31 years of age I feel that I might be a little old for a birthday party so I plan to do the next best thing, be nothing but a lazy shit, all day long. I might leave the house once or twice but I promise it won't be for anything productive.

I was orignally planning on getting a tatto but I seem to be a bit low on booty if ya catch my drift. Oh well maybe next year.

Current music:John Mayer (My Stupid Mouth, Your Body Is A wonderlandCome Back To Bed) Method man and Redman (Da Rockwilder),Lil Kim (If I was a dude), House of pain (Top of the morning to ya, Jump around, Put on your shitkikcers, Shammrocks and Shinanigans, Guess who's back Danny boy Boomshaloklokboom), Ice cube (Put your back into it, Ghetto bird) , random quotes from Jonny depp, Floater (Endless, Danny boy, Clean and plastic baby) Jimmy Buffet (A pirate looks at at forty)


Go ahead run a serach in your favorite file sharing for House of Pain. I got 186 locations that the song 'Jump around' can be downloaded from. I have to say that so far it's one of the best remixes of the song I've heard so far.

I must say that this whole comuter-internet-thingy is quite impressive. I can remember a time when you had to go to the libary to get books. But now anyone can turn on an electric device and be able access vast volume of all kinds information. Anyone can view the current news, learn a new language, listen to music, or veiw the Mona Lisa. You can even expose yourself to different culture. Stuff like that wasn't even available to your average hard workin american when I was growing up. There was a point in my life that having an Atari made you cool.

There's something strange about the fact that the movie Chicken Little comes out in theaters on my birthday. Isn't that about the world ending.

1. How tall are you?
6’2”

2. Do you own a gun?
No

3. Rehab? Counseling?
You mean I have to pick one

4. Have you ever killed an animal?
I just killed a bug

5. Are you Irish?
Yes, now kiss me damn it.

6. What do you think when you hear hot dogs?
They make me think of the Oscar Meyer wiener song which makes me wish I were an Oscar Meyer wiener so that everyone would be in love with me.

7. What's your favorite Christmas song?
Frosty the snowman

8. What is your favorite smell?
My baby girls head

9. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
Whiskey, but I settle for coffee day after day

10. Do you do pushups
Does pushing myself up out of bed count?

11. Have you ever done ecstasy?
Nope.

12. Have you been shot?
I’ve been shot at but they missed or I deflected it, I’m not quite sure.

13. Have you ever been hospitalized?
Yes. It’s a long disgusting story. We’ll leave it at that.

14. Do you like painkillers?
When I’m in pain.

15. What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
It’s so secret I don’t even know what it is.

16. Do you own a knife?
Yes

17. Do you have A.D.D?
What was the question… next question.

18. Do you love the pain a tattoo brings?
I don’t know yet…yet.

19. Name Five Drinks You Regularly Drink:
Whiskey
Whiskey
Whiskey
Rum and coke
milk

20. What's In Your CD Player?
Spiderman 2 the movie

21. What's Under Your Bed?
floor

22. Current Hair?
disheveled

23. What are you wearing?
Black hoodie and blue pajama bottoms.

24. Current Worry?
That my little girl will never go to sleep.

25. Current Love?
My two girls.

26. Current Hate?
immunization shots

27. Favorite Place To Be?
Deep in the forest.

28. Least Favorite Place To Be?
Standing in line.

29. If You Could Play an Instrument?
I would play the triangle.

30. Favorite Color?
Red

31. Person From Your Past You Wish You Could be with Right Now?
I’ve put the past were it belongs, behind me.

32. Where Would You Like To Go?
To nevernever land

33. Where Do you want to live?
Good ol’ P-town which is were do be livin.

34. Favorite food?
Cow

35. Color of most clothes you own?
black

36. Number of pillows you sleep with?
one

37. What do you wear when you go to sleep?
clothes are not for sleeping

38. What were you doing at 12AM last night?
Sleeping in bed next to my beautiful girlfriend and my baby girl.

39. What do you think you'll be doing in 10 years?
Ballet recitals, national spelling bee championships

40. Are you paranoid?
Why? Who’s asking? What’s with all of these questions?

41. First piercing/tattoo?
My ear when I was about ten years old. Mom let me do it despite the fact that dad thought it would turn me gay.

42. Last person you yelled at?
psycho ex

43. Last crush?
orange, before that was strawberry.

44. Last thing you ate?
A delightful little ice cream concoction called “Everything but the…”

45. If you could be a pirate what would you say?
Could be? What the hell are saying? Damn it, look at the user ID “Scallywagdaddy” I am a pirate and anyone who says otherwise will be walking the plank.

46. Do you have an iPod?
no

47. When and why did you last vomit?
August, at a pirate party. I did it on purpose because I didn’t want to spoil the party

48. What's in your pockets right now?
lighter, smokes, lint

49. What color are your bedroom walls?
white

50. Last thing that made you laugh?
My little girl giggling after some belly kisses.

51. Any pets now?
One cat that only loves me when I have ice cream.

52. Inny or an outty?
inny

53. Do you have any piercings?
Two, below the belt.

54. If you were a crayon what color would you be?
Pirate’s blood red

55. Have u ever won any awards?
I got an employee of the month once.

56.How many TV's do you have in your house?
one

57. Have you ever sprained/broken/fractured a bone or gotten stiches?
Sprained my wrist in football practice, got stitches on the back of my head after hearing Chuck Berry’s “My ding-a-ling” and sprained my ankle last year when I was staring at my girls boobs when I should have been paying attention to where I was going.

58. Who do you tell your dreams to?
My girlfriend and my daughter.

59. if you could pick one person to make out with who would it be?
Drew Barrymore, hands down.

60. What do you think of the person who posted this before you?
She’s easily one of the coolest chicks I know. Plus, she's family so I have to love her… but that’s not why I do.

Tonight Marsina went to something called a "Naked Ladies party". When I heard this the first time my mind went off into some sorority girl, pajama party, pillow fight, dream sequence. This however is not quite the case it basically a bunch of girlfriends that get together, bring all of there old clothes they don't want, they throw them in a big pile and pick out the ones they want. Can you imagine guys trying to this. Ha, I can't even imagine getting any of my friend's to go to anything called "Naked man party". Now think about what guys would consider clothes they don't want; That pair of skin tight 501's with the crotch torn out or that Iron Maiden shirt a million holes in it and the sleeves torn off. Girls will say they don't want something if it's gone out of style or if it just doesn't fit them the right way. Guys on the other hand will where clothes that are 10 years out of style and haven't fit them since they were in high school. Girls would say "Oh Sally, I'll take that green sweater if your not going to wear it." Guys would end up saying things like "Hey Chuck, if your not gonna keep that orange Wrestlemania VII shirt I'll wear it just to scare the wife." Anyway so that's the naked lady party thing she went to.

Bella and I stayed home while she went. We played for a little while and watched The Simpsons. Then, at around 7:30pm my sweet, beautiful, loving child's head spun around five or six times and when it stopped she was possessed by some awful demon. I'm pretty much a common sense sort of guy so when she decided that she didn't want to be held but didn't want to be put down my brain started to short circuit a little. I'm sure that if anyone had been there to observe they would have heard the springs and sprockets in my head go "Sproing" and little sparks could be seen shooting out of my ears. When I was finally able to get her at least close to falling asleep she kept waking herself up by shaking or jerking her arms. So being the "common sense" kind of guy that I am I tried swaddling (wrapping her tightly in a small blanket) her up. This of course pissed her off and confused me even more. We both finally crashed out an hour and half later from exhaustion. Then I woke up to write this. Now I'm going back to bed because tomorrow we go to the doctor for her four month appointment...which means shots. Wish me luck.

This morning in the Living section of the Oregonian there was an articla about a school in Florida that has posted a sign on their playground that says "No Running". They also have no swings, no merry-go-round, and no teeter-totter. Maybe they should just post a sign that says "No Fun". Their reasoning for this is that running, swinging, merry-go-rounding, teetering, and tottering are dangerous and cause accidents which lead to lawsuits.

I have an idea, stupid parents should stop suing schools for accidents that happen to their stupid kids when there playing. If the kid was not taught not to stick his fingers under the teeter-totter maybe losing a finger will teach him a little frickin common sense. Maybe the hospital bill will be a lesson to the parents to teach their kid how to use their head. Kids have accidents. That is a cold hard fact of parenting life.

Until this happens, maybe the schools should just glue (using non-toxic super safety glue) a nerf ball (painted beige so as not to hurt the eyes) to the ground and tell the kids to just stare at it for fun. Oh yeah, the kids will go nuts for that.

My life has been a little less piratical as late however this doesn't mean it's been less exciting. Work has been a complete and utter madhouse because one of my co-workers, who's in the army reserves, was sent to Louisiana to help in the relief efforts. Since then, they hired some new guy and he's been trying really hard to learn the job but still hasn't learn everything he needs to so I've been forced to pick up most of the slack. I worked 14 hours of overtime last week alone and we're not talking about some job were sit in a comfy cubical all day, it's hard labor. There were some nights when all I wanted to do was come home kiss Bella and Marsina goodnight and sleep for a week.

This week is a little better. Monday was very helpful because it was national "Talk like a pirate" day so I got all of my Arr's out o'me system. I shivered me timbers and hoisted the main sail. I called everyone at work scallywags and wenches walked around like I had a wooden leg. All week long I've been pretending that the rather large machine that I operate is a pirate ship with me as the captain. I run up and down the deck barking orders at the deck hands.

Though even with all the pirate talk I've felt less like a captain and more like just another guy floating aimlessly. I miss hangin out with me boys and drinkin and cavortin.

Home life however is still quite amazing and my little pirate princess is learning all kinds of new tricks she's able to sit up on her own for short periods of time (which I'm told is advanced for her age) and has become very accomplished at rolling over onto her belly. She's giggling more than ever which of course makes me giggle which makes her giggle and that makes me giggle and then she starts giggling even more and...I think you get the picture. She has however decided that she loves mommy more but I can't say that I blame her. Marsina is after all her only food source and on top of that she's one hell of a mom. The both of them are fast asleep right now and I think it's about time for me to do the same.

My little girl has slipped into nah-nah land. She's had a busy day so far. She woke up this morning with a little bit of a cough that worries me a little but this is the first time she's ever shown any sign of being sick. I'm sure it's something simple like the change in seasons. She was still in a good mood though so we decided to watch a little football and then she helped me clean the bathroom. I did most of the cleaning but she provided all of the moral support. Then we went into the kitchen were she helped me make a little something to eat. Once again I did all the work and she took care of all the noise making.

She's waking up now and will now doubt want to be fed. I guess it's time to put the computer down and warm up a bottle. Duty calls and I'm here to answer.

I used to get paid to kick people's asses and pick up on girls. I used to run through the forest in search of greater knowledge. I used to make things out of play dough and I called all of it work. I used to deal with the meanest nastiest people and when I was through with them they would thank me for what I'd done. Now I go to sleep early and come straight home from work. I used to smoke tons of pot and drink until the sun came up. I don't go out with the boys as much anymore. I haven't done any sort of recreational drug in some time now. The last beer I had was with my dinner and I only had one (and I got a buzz off if it). Caffeine has now become the hard stuff. The only think I smoke now is legal and has been approved by the FDA. I am now a daddy.

The question is; Is it worth it?

The answer for some people may not be simply yes or no. But if you heard my little girl giggle for the first time the other day like I did, you'd know that the answer.

Randow stuff the my cousin turned me onto:

( The Random Question Meme! )

Lots of crazy things. To quote Bill and Ted, "There are strange things afoot at the Circle K." I promise not to bore you with the details if you promise not to care about them. Just know that I'm feeling weird this week. Not weird like 'I've got ebola' weird, more like 'Oh my god I've been bitten by a radioactive spider' weird.

Fatherhood has made me into some sort of superhero. I guess I should try and come up with a name for my new alter ego. Superdad would be to cliche and Wonderdaddy just doesn't feel right. Uberpapa is just plain lame. Maybe I should think more about what my super powers are... I can make a bottle in the blink of an eye. I can block out the sound of crying babies. I can wake up bright and early every morning, go to work, and still manage to function. Seriously, I wasn't able to pull that last one off until very recently. I know, I call myself Bottledude... no that one sucks too. I guess I'll just have to keep working on it.

We took a family trip to the zoo on Sunday. It's been quite a while since I've been to the Portland zoo and I must say that it's changed, a lot.

Marsina and I loaded Bella and her stroller up and took the MAX train to meet up with some of Bella's cousins. I was her cousin Jacob's birthday and their grandpa decided to take him. She's still too young to really appreciate everything that the zoo has to offer but she did enjoy looking at the new elephant, Tusko. She has an elephant at home but it's no where near as big. As for the rest of the animals, well, she just wasn't interested in what they had to offer. She slept most of the day but woke up a few times for so good photo ops. We got some great shots of her and Marsina while we were riding the zoo train.

What was great about this trip for me is that I can vaguely remember going to the same zoo with my cousins and I know there are some great pictures of us as well. I had been missing those youthful moments spent running for one animal to the next, sometimes racing my cousins to see who could get there first.

John, the oldest of those cousins, now has a little boy of his own. And Josh, the third oldest, has kids of his own too. John lives on the east coast and rarely gets back to visit. Josh lives in the bay area and I haven't seen him in many (too many) years. I'm hoping that one day soon we'll all be able to get together and maybe get up to the zoo to see if we can relive some of those old days and maybe make some nice memories for our own kids.

Wow, what an eventful week. My new work schedule is working out great. I used to get off work at 8pm which meant I wasn't getting home until my princess had already gone to sleep. Now, I get home around 4pm which means we get to see a lot more of each other. I'm slowly but surely getting the hang of being a dad.

Last night was the 2nd annual Pirate party so Bella got to go stay with her grandma and grandpa while Marsina (AKA the Pirate Queen) and I ran off to party with the other wenches and scallywags. We both had a great time and it was wonderful to hang out with other adults and do adult type things but we both couldn't help looking forward to when we could leave and go get our pirate princess. I ran into a lot of people that I hadn't seen since before Bella was born and they all wanted to know if we had the baby yet and how we were holding up. I had to fight the urge to pull out the picture I have in my wallet. I have to remember that not everyone wants to hear every last detail about her last dirty diaper so I settled for telling them that she is the most incredible baby in the universe and that Marsina and I are doing just fine. Interesting side note about the Pirate party: The year before, at the 1st annual Pirate party, my brother, my sister and I stood on the porch of the Pirate house, almost to drunk to stand, and pinky swore that we would never have children. Unbeknownst to Marsina and I, Bellona was conceived just a few hours previous to that pinky swear.

Today Masina had to work early so Bella and I had a lovely morning filled with naps, feedings, and changing diapers. Of course in between those things we smiled and made squeaking noises at each other. Then in the afternoon we went for a walk down to the pirate house (where I used to live). The whole reason for walking down there was that she and I were going to steal back our pirate flag from my brother. By the time we got there the flag the flag was already gone. We decided that since we couldn't get the flag back that we would go up the hill to Starbucks so that I could drown my sorrows in caffeine.

Today was my very first daddy day. Marsina went back today and I got to spend the whole day with Bella. Nobody tells you that you first day alone with your little girl will be one of the most magical days you will ever experience. Sitting here now and looking back on it, we didn’t do that much but it was all so much fun. We played with Mr. Octopus who makes a rattling noise and has lots of arms that are perfect for giving baby hugs. Then we played with Mr. Starfish who squeaks when he gives her kisses.

My good friend Josh stopped by to see if I could help our friend Keith, who’s moving to Seattle, pack up his stuff. Of course once Josh realized that I was spending the day with Bella he said that I was released from my friendly obligation to help move. If I had know that all you have to do to get out of helping friends move is to have a kid I would have done it years ago. Josh hung out for a little while so Bella decided that she wanted to show him that she could stand up on her own two legs (as long as daddy was there to keep her balanced). He looked genuinely impressed and he not one that impresses easily.

Then we went to have lunch with Marsina. She, of course, had to introduce Bella to the girls at work. I’ve never seen so many grown women make so much of a fuss over a baby, even if she is the most beautiful baby it the world.

By the time we got home Josh had come back from helping with the move so the three of us decided to go down to the pool and relax for a little while. Shortly after that Bella took a nice long nap until Marsina came home. All in all it was a wonderful day and I’m so glad that we’ll have Saturday’s to spend some Bella/Daddy time.